Melissa Perry Photography

Funny story.  I started this post back in the summer after I made my announcement about taking some of August “off”.  The darndest thing happened though.  I didn’t get around to posting.  Imagine that?  So now I am tweaking the post.  I have even changed the title.  Flashback back to summer.  When I made the announcement in the summer it was not really just to say it to clients and the world but to say it to MYSELF.  I realize I am not that important that I need to be running around making decrees and announcements…I definitely do NOT think I am all that and a bag of chips.  If you know me you would know quite the opposite—I struggle with insecurities, self doubt and feelings of not being worthy on a regular basis.  I work feverishly and at times tend to border on workaholic status and actually enjoy it…i CRAVE being busy and active.  There comes a time however, when I figure out that I need to recharge and prioritize.  And I have to say sometimes I am not good at that.  I let other things get in the way or even procrastinate what I know would be beneficial for the betterment of self.

This past Saturday I went to the Michael W. Smith concert.  Now if you are friend with me on facebook you are probably sick to death of my posts proclaiming my LOVE for his music and how much I enjoyed his concert.  My sweet as pie hubby actually surprised me with backstage passes to meet Michael or “Smitty” as his friends call him and I wept.  I mean cried like a baby.  Tears of joy to meet such an inspiration.  Anyway on to my point.  We met Michael before the show.  He was as down to earth, kindhearted and sweet as I thought he would be.  He asked me about my job as a Kindergarten teacher and although I was star struck the experience will forever stick with me.  After the meet and greet we took our seats and prepared to enjoy the concert.   The first song played…I cried.  The second song played…I cried.  It was as if  the floodgates opened and out came my tears.  It happened a few other times throughout the evening and also upon returning home.  When I attended his concert the music spoke to me as it always does but something inside of my soul changed. It resonated with me in a way that has started to shift my thoughts and cause me to see that although I am unworthy of anything that being Christ’s child makes me worthy of His LOVE.  Michael told a story about being in his 20′s and hearing from God’s voice saying that he not only loved him but he liked him.  Many days I wonder if I am honestly liked at all.  I sin, I fail, I am just not who I am called to be on a regular occasion.  No matter…He still loves me.  And though I have known this some 30+ years (haha not going to give away exactly how much the + is…) :) it still was something I thought about deeper at the concert.  I also reviewed my relationships with others and myself.  I reflected on my shortcomings and have truly been changed.  I am now even more aware of who I am and who I want to be.  That does not involve a job title, a pat on the back, a proclamation of greatness.  It is about my heart, my soul, who I am to the core.  For that I will forever by grateful to Michael W. Smith.  He has left a lasting impression and message imprinted on who I am.

And because music is my prayer and speaks louder than words I am posting not one but TWO songs that spoke to me that night.  I really tried to decide on one but could not.  There are some songs that I cried through and some that  I didn’t.  I can’t remember if I cried at these or not.  I just know their lyrics made an impact.  I will go no further with my words and let Michael’s words speak to you.

THIS IS YOUR TIME - a story and tribute to Cassie Bernall who lost her life in Columbine because of her faith

Never Been Unloved - even though we are sinners we are worth it in Christ’s eyes

~xo Mel~